I recently read It’s All About Him: Finding the Love of My Life by Denise Jackson, wife of country singer Alan Jackson, with Ellen Vaughn. I have not been a huge Alan Jackson fan, but there were certain songs I really liked by him, including one video that was filmed locally. When I heard about the book, I knew that it was written about how the Jackson family survived an affair, so I was really interested. When I realized the “Him” in the book title was about my Lord Jesus Christ, and after I had read an excerpt, I knew I really had to read the book!

Denise opens the book discussing how she met Alan and what their marriage was like before the affair. She and Alan grew up in Southern Baptist homes and accepted Christ as their Saviour as children, but both got away from Him as they grew up. She tells of how Alan got his career off the ground and how all the trappings of success took them farther and farther from the Lord. Denise is painfully honest at how needy she was as a wife, trying always to please Alan to the point that she was not her own woman. (I believe that a woman and man should always try to please each other, but she went too far with it. She could not even function without him in the basic of ways.) Although she is not taking the blame for Alan’s affair, she acknowledges that it was one of the major reasons she almost lost her marriage.

I knew nothing about the affair until a week before I got the book, so I went into reading the book with an unbiased view. Denise is very careful to be extremely respectful when discussing the affair. As a matter of fact, she goes into few details. She leaves you feeling the dignity of Alan, even though he made a serious mistake. I love how she treats him and makes the reader feel compassion for the man who repented of his sin.

What totally surprised me about the book was the complete love and passion that Denise has for the Lord and His Word. She is not ashamed of Him, and He is enveloped in every area of her life and seen on every page of the book. It is not fluffy, pretty words, but a rock solid grounding on her life in God. Denise shares how her separation from Alan drove her to her knees, and she realized that her life’s focus should be on Jesus, not solely on Alan. I think her mistake is what many women make, along with thinking that a man can meet every need she has. Even the very best men in the world cannot meet our every need. By falling in love with the Lord, she became the woman that Alan could love more deeply and respect, along with being the mother, friend, etc. that she should be. Denise also gives the plan of salvation at the end of the book. I’m sure that those reading the book looking for dirty laundry will get quite the surprise!

I wanted to leave a few quotes that I loved:

“When everything is going well, we often can’t hear God, because the music all around us is turned up too loud. But when the party stops– in those moments of crashing pain, sorrow, and sudden silence– we begin to hear His voice. I’ve learned that if I listen and lean on His strength, He can help me climb out of the wreckage. As I do, I have new perspectives about what is precious and what is truly important.” (p. 191)

“I’ve found that the more I dig into the Bible as His love letter to me, the more I develop a passion for it, and for Him. When my heart is cold and unwilling, I ask Him to change it, and incredibly, He does. As my days unfold, I make sure to schedule uninterrupted time to read God’s Word and pray. It’s a discipline to do so… but when I do it, it fulfills my deepest desires. (p. 203)

“But I’m learning that I don’t have to be afraid or anxious when the crises come. God is with me. He will give me whatever I need to get through life’s challenges. He can do miracles in me, right in the midst of troubled times.” (p. 221)

“But that’s where I find real life in my relationship with Jesus so absolutely freeing. I don’t have to be perfect. I can’t be perfect. But I know that He is with me, forgiving me when I fail and picking me up when I fall. And because of His presence and power with me, I can begin to be the wife, mother, daughter, and friend that I was truly designed to be. When it’s all about Him, then our stories not only have an unbelievably happy ultimate ending, but every chapter- happy or sad– is somehow sweeter than the one before.” (p. 220)

Whether you are a country music fan or not, I believe you will be greatly blessed by reading It’s All About Him and be challenged to love Him so much more. You’ll also realize as Denise and Alan did that nothing but the Lord can give you true happiness.

Disclaimer

Please note that I realize that some Christians feel that a Christian should not listen to music that is not expressly Christian. While I respect and understand that conviction completely, I personally believe that music, books, movies, etc., should all be taken on a case by case basis, without throwing the baby out with the bathwater. I may listen to one song, while turning off another, even Christian ones. I may watch one movie, while never viewing another. Does the song, book, or movie you are listening to/reading please or dishonor Christ? This question will certainly leave certain genres of music out of the question, at least for me, while others must be determined individually.

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer. ~Psalms 19:14

Posted under Book Reviews, Christianity, Encouraging Quotes, Music, Recommended Reading